In the throes of a new relationship, not very new, but before the "I love you", there are things you want to hear from the your love interest. You need to know you're important to him. You want to know you're his first choice to spend time with, that he picks you when he has something important or funny to say. Even after the "I love you"....and the "I do"....these same things are still important. I'm fortunate that Hubby doesn't let me forget how valuable I am to him. He treasures me, and he lets me know it every day. There's something more, right now, that I want to hear from him.
I would like to know that this house, these friends, and this small city are IT for us. At least for the foreseeable future. I want to talk about the landscaping, the kitchen counters and the floors (bare cement for two years now) as if we are the ones who will be enjoying all of it in the coming years. I want a commitment to our present circumstances. I want to feel permanent somewhere. I'm starting to feel permanent here, but I'm nervous about bringing it up with him. What if he doesn't feel the same way? What if he doesn't say it back?
So, I look and listen for clues. Does he want what I want? are we here to stay? I'll work up the nerve to ask him. Soon.